Have you ever seen an abandoned house before? You walk in, graffiti on the walls, glass on the floor, you'll see stains, torn up furniture and walls. You just wonder, what went wrong here? What stories do people have about this place? This abandoned house was once a beautiful, sturdy home, filled with laughter, family, memories, till something one day, went wrong.
Sometimes I think of people, myself, as an abandoned house. Day by day, in this world we live in, things go wrong, things that leave marks on ourselves, things that shatter our hearts, people speak lies over us that graffiti onto our bodies, stains are left on our souls and we wake up one day, seeing the final mess, wondering what went wrong.
We tend to put a "Do Not Disturb" sign on our life when things aren't working, but all that does is add another brick on the wall or put a stronger lock on the door... But God is still knocking and still awaiting his invitation to come in. "The Lord himself goes before you & will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged" Deuteronomy 31:8.
"We cannot have intimacy with God or anyone else if we stay hidden and offer only who we think we ought to be or what we believe is wanted."
God wants the True you, in your bare, rawest form. The most beautiful form of yourself.
"You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart" Jeremiah 29:13
The more I've opened the door and allow God into my home, he's revealed to me what lies about myself I've been believing, he's revealed to me the roots to my pain, he's taught me to forgive, he's slowly teaching me who I am, what I have to offer, that I do have value. He's taking one brick off the wall I've built one day at a time. No, I'm not looking for sympathy, I'm simply telling you that there is healing available. There is a God who loves, cares and wants the best for you.
"If we do not let God perfect his strength in our weakness, we won't be able to endure and finish the race."
Whenever we fall off the track, take the wrong turn, we always feel like God has left, that we have to do it on our own but it's in the fire that God moves. In Daniel 4, there's a story about 3 men, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego (don't ask me what their parents were thinking), who refused to worship an image of gold that their King made, long story short, the King was provoked and threatened to throw them into a fire. "If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us from your Majesty's hand" Daniel 4:17. Long story short, the 3 men were thrown into the blazing furnace, but to the King's surprise, he saw 4 men in the fire... "Look! I see four men walking around in the fire, unbound and unharmed, and the fourth looks like a son of the gods" Daniel 4:25.
Lately, God has been teaching me that I've built walls, protecting my heart, guarding my thoughts to somehow prevent further pain, to prevent letting someone in and tearing up what I have left of the furniture stored in my heart, but it has gotten to the point where I don't even allow God in. "Here I am, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they are with me" Revelation 3:20. God is waiting, God is patient, God has been knocking on my door for 20 years. I've opened it a crack, with the door chain still on, where I've just received a glimpse of his goodness. God won't force himself on you, he's waiting until you are ready to open up that door and let him in fully.
God longs to bring healing, God sees the potential the house has, the potential YOU have. He longs to put on the tool belt, hand you the nails as he uses the hammer, construct a new foundation and help you rebuild your beautiful, welcoming house. You just have to say yes.
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